Tears
by Pinstripes and Buttons
Summary: Remus X Tonks. A misunderstanding and the same old battle. R


Ginny pulled open the door of her home to find Tonks standing out on the porch, "What are you doing here?" she asked in a gentle but questioning tone. Tonks sighed and stepped inside as Ginny moved from the threshold. They were silent as Tonks led the way over to the couch, one hand over her stomach the whole time. "I'll go get mum then..." Ginny said quietly, and left the room.

Tonks sat and waited, tracing circles on the dark fabric that covered her middle as she held back tears. "Tonks? My dear what happened? Where's Remus?" Molly said, rushing towards her.

Tonks looked up absently, "He's out..."

"Do you really think it best not to be at home when he returns?" Molly asked, sitting next to Tonks.

"The difference would be little. I'm a horrible person... as he said." Tonks voice was shallow and airy.

Molly tilted her head, as if trying to read Tonks mine. Finally, she dared to ask, "Why would he say such a thing to you, hun?"

"We were eating and we were just talking right? So he asked me if anything happened at the doctors and if they knew why I've been sick every morning..." tears were starting to roll down her cheeks; she brushed them away with the backs of her hands, "...And I nodded and when he asked I told him I was... was..."

"Pregnant." Molly finished and Tonks burst into a full on sob fest. Molly wrapped an arm around her and hugged her close, "Shh, it's okay. But why does that make you a horrible person? I don't understand how he could blame you for this."

Tonks struggled to get enough air to speak, but managed and said, "He... t-told me to g-g-get rid of _it_... S-said he d-didn't w-want a child... That would be like him..." Tonks put her hand back on her stomach, "I told him no, and he told me he didn't want a child that would be a werewolf. I said that it might not be a werewolf and he knocked over a bunch of stuff. He said that I was a horrible person for wanting to bring a monster into the world and he wasn't going to stay with me if I did...

"I told him that it didn't matter to me because if I really cared about that I'd never have married him. He said I shouldn't have and that the child could grow up without him... I screamed at him and ran away... And ended up here..." Tonks finished, drying her eyes but still breathing unevenly.

Molly hugged her again, "Let me go make some tea." she left the couch and, on her way to the kitchen stopped by the stairs and shouted, "RON, GINNY, MAKE A ROOM!" she looked over her shoulder to smile at Tonks and disappeared into the kitchen.

Tonks got off the couch and went to the window. Outside was dark, the only light coming from the next house a half mile away. She sighed and pressed her hand up against the cool window pane. _Somewhere out there... He's thinking I'll return... But how can I return to someone who'd ask such a thing... Maybe until the child arrives, he could be mine... _Tonks thought miserably. That would only make it harder if he really didn't want a child that was half of him and left her... _but maybe he won't leave... _Who was she kidding? It'd taken her near five years to get him to see that she honestly did love him for everything he was and every flaw he had.

"Why do guys have to be so headstrong?" she muttered under her breath, letting single tears slid aimlessly down her face. She turned away from the window as Molly brought her her tea and led her up to her room.

She didn't stay at the window long enough to see what had happened outside. She'd missed the long grass moving as someone in a ragged cloak broke away from it. When they removed their hood, she hadn't seen that it was Remus, or that his features screamed heartache. She'd looked right through him the whole time, lost in her thoughts.

He'd stared at her longingly. When she turned away from the window, he reached out for her, to beg her never to leave him. He ached to beg her to forgive him, to explain how wrong and stupid he was for everything. He wanted to hold her close to him again, feel her soft hand in his. It was torture not having her next to him anymore. He wanted nothing more than to make her smile again.

But she'd been crying the whole time she was at the window, and he knew she'd never take a fool like him back. _Why would she? _He thought sadly, _after what I did... what I said... _He hated himself for letting her get away.

_Knock, knock, knock_

"I'll get it mum," Ginny said. She was there anyway. So she jumped back down the three stairs she'd climbed and peered out the spy hole. _Nobody? Am I going deaf? _Ginny opened the door to make sure that there really was no one out there. "Who are you?" Ginny demanded, moving her free hand to her side, ready to grab her wand at a moment's notice; her other hand remained on the door.

The dark figure shifted, as though they were uncomfortable, "Is Tonks-"

"Remus?" Ginny asked in a whisper, cutting him off.

He removed his hood and questioned, "How'd you know it was me?"

Ginny put a finger over her lips and let him inside. She led him into the living room and motioned for him to sit, "What are you doing here?"

"I came to-" Remus began,

But Ginny cut him off again, "You're a horrible, horrible person you know. Telling Tonks such things." she whispered, "I heard everything from the stairs. How could you say that to her?"

"I'm an idiot; I'll admit that but-"

"Yes, you are an idiot. Can't you see how much she loves you? Are you honestly that blind?" Ginny said, cutting him off for a third time, struggling to keep her voice at a whisper.

Remus nodded, "I know I am..." he waited for Ginny to interrupt him, but she didn't. She just sat there and gave him a stern look.

Remus stood up and walked towards the stairs. "Third floor, second door." Ginny said and smiled slightly.

"Thank you" and he disappeared.

"I'm just one floor up, my dear, if you need anything." Molly said, sighed and left Tonks alone.

Tonks sat on the window seat and pulled her knees close to her, a pillow squished between her legs and stomach. She laid her head on the pillow and faced the window, not truly seeing what lay beyond it. Her mind returned to their wedding day. They'd been so happy together.

There was a fragile tapping coming from the door. She decided not to acknowledge it. It was the Weasley house; they had the right to go into any room they wished.

The door to her room opened and shut quietly, still Tonks paid no attention. It wasn't until a pair of arms wrapped themselves around her and she heard the words, "Forgive me." did she move.

"Remus? What are you doing here?" Tonks asked, entirely confused.

He got down on his knees and took her hands in his, "Please, Tonks, forgive the fool who hurt you. I was wrong, stupid and out of line. I want nothing more than to see you smile, to hear you laugh. I want you to be by my side or better or for worse. I want to have this child with you. I want to watch it grow. I'm sorry I ever said otherwise. I just-"

Tonks pushed her lips against his, pulling him closer to her, "Don't you ever abandon me again Remus John Lupin." she said, getting down to the floor in front of him.

"How could I ever leave someone as incredibly perfect as you?" Remus said and pulled her into a hug. He felt whole again, happy. And as few tears rolled off her face, Tonks smiled, knowing they were only tears of pure joy


End file.
